How Have They Embarrassed Me Lately?

So I know children are life’s little awkward moment makers, but mine occasionally do things that even make me blush.

Lola:
We’re walking along at the shops and there is a very muscular, clean shaven headed, heavily tattooed gentleman who is obviously having a coffee after his recent gym expedition.
To which Lola points and exclaims: “LADY!”

Dex:
There are three children crowded around a teacher, Dex being one of them.
child 1: Child 2 said FUCK!
Child 2: No, Dexter said FUCK!
Dex: No, Child 1 said FUCK!
Continuing with the teacher in a shocked silence for two or three minutes until Miss Yvette told ALL children to stop saying it, or there would be no icypoles. at which point, Dex chimes in and says (Very Loudly)
“My Mummy says FUCK all the time!”

If only the world could swallow me up.

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