Is It a Thing?

Is a quarter year life crisis a thing?
Or maybe a not having any more babies crisis.
Or an almost 10 year reunion in high school crisis.
Or an I don’t know who I am anymore crisis.

I don’t know.
I don’t even know if it is a crisis.

Apart from the body trying to throw almost panic attacks at me for no fucking reason other than I am no longer on blood pressure medication, I think it’s going pretty well.

I mean, I got a full time job. Granted, not the most mentally challenging job in the world but it feels good.
I think people underestimate how good it feels to spend money they’ve earned.
It also feels good to be doing something that has adult conversation. Don’t get me wrong, I miss my kids in a way only a stay at home parent who has gone back to work can but at the same time ohhhh sweet adult conversation.
Oh lunch break. Oh 10 minute rest breaks. Highlights of my days.

Do other parents come out the other side of those baby years (yeah, I thought that meant a full night sleep too, but let me tell you, I was wrong!) and wonder who the fuck they are?
where did everything they enjoyed go?
Who is this person with the boring hair in the pony tail and ugg boots?
To the shops WHAT?!

I mean sure, I have some pretty wicked kids from it.
Wouldn’t trade them even if I have gained forehead wrinkles.
But I also want me.

I’m working on it.

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2 thoughts on “Is It a Thing?

  1. Yes yes and yes. I had started to work out what the hell I was doing during the 7 year gap between kids… And then it all went to shit. This time I had learned to ask for a bit of time and space for me, so I’m not as lost as I was years ago. The reunion hit me between the eyes and I agonised, and worried and went and had a horrible time… But last week I had an epiphany – I didn’t like going to school with these people why do I CARE?

    Take a big deep breath, enjoy the uninterrupted cuppas at work! I know the wrench of being at home and returnig to work, it’s tough xx

    • I have that thought too.mine isn’t until next year, and I’m thinking I am only friends with a select few of these people why do I care if they think I’m doing well or not. It’s the awkward teen in me wanting to be like I think 😉

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